I hope it's not too late

There was a time in my life when I thought "in the future...that is when I will really focus on my faith."

I was very content living my life how I wanted to and only calling on God when I was in a rough patch of life. When looking at others that were taking their faith more seriously, I would always feel like they were really missing out on life. Obviously, this was a warped view of the world that allowed me full reign to live a sinful life without large amounts of guilt.

God started to place people in my life that started to change my perception of Christians that were "missing out on life." One by one these people came into my life and I was like a moth to a flame. I wanted to be around them, talk to them and figure out why I was so drawn to them. I would quickly find out that they were living their lives for Christ and not missing out on anything.

This is a nice story and all but there is one big mountain that appeared as soon as I thought about changing my life like they did.


What if it's too late for me?
What if my past choices will always keep me from that peaceful place they live?
What if I already messed it up for myself?

Remember that most of these people went to Christian high schools and colleges, grew up in the church, knew scripture by heart and their idea of "sin" was having a beer..once. That was a LONG way from the life I had lived. I felt like I had a barrier around me that would keep me from ever being in the same category as those "good Christian girls." This was a lie from the enemy.

It took me a long time to come to reality with my past and to believe that God covered those sins with Jesus on the cross. God knew exactly the path of life I would take and loves me unconditionally.

Unconditionally....do you know what that means? It means that my past doesn't affect my future in God's eyes. It means that it is NEVER too late to turn your life around. God is strong when we are weak...and I have some serious experience in being weak. God can't shine through perfect people which is why none of us are perfect.

Everyday that I trust in God's Faithfulness and Grace...that barrier of past sin around me disintegrates and I know I am a Jesus girl. Not a second class Jesus girl but a beloved daughter of the King. Whatever you did before doesn't compare to the love God has for you...it is like a grain of sand in the ocean of his Grace.

This verse may be my favorite because it talks about our weakness as a way for God's strength to shine.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is make perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

This song is perfect for  me and maybe it is for you too....I'm not who I was. Only by God's grace...

I'm not who I was by Brandon Heath